Rules: Bold the following that are true about you, italicize things you wish were true, add one true thing about you, and then tag five more people.

I miss somebody right now.
I don't watch much TV these days( I am dying of deprivation!)
I love olives.
I own lots of books.
I wear glasses or contact lenses.
I love to play video games.
I've tried marijuana.
I've watched porn movies.
I have been in a threesome.
I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
I curse sometimes.
I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
I'm TOTALLY smart.
I've broken someone's bones.

I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal.
I hate the rain.
I'm paranoid at times.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
I need money right now.
I love sushi.
I talk really, really fast
I have fresh breath in the morning.
I have long hair.
I have lost money in Las Vegas.
I have at least one sibling.
I was born in a country outside of the U.S.
I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
I couldn't survive without Caller I.D.
I like the way that I look.
I have lied to a good friend in the last 6 months.
I know how to cornrow.
I am usually pessimistic.
I have a lot of mood swings.
I think prostitution should be legalized.
I think Britney Spears is pretty.
Slept with a Suitemate. (what?)
I have a hidden talent.
I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
I have a lot of friends.
I am currently single.
I have pecked someone of the same sex.
I enjoy talking on the phone.
I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
I love to shop. (Does window shopping count?)
Enjoy window shopping.
I would rather shop than eat.
I would classify myself as ghetto.
I'm bourgie and have worn a sweater tied around my shoulders.
I'm obsessed with my Xanga or Livejournal.
I don't hate anyone. I dislike them.
I'm a pretty good dancer.
I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother. (on the contrary, I’m proud to be wif my mum unless when she starts bargaining)
I have a cell phone.
I believe in (a) God.
I watch MTV on a daily basis.
I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
I've rejected someone before.
I currently like someone.
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
I want to have children in the future.
I have changed a diaper before.
I've called the cops on a friend before.
I am a member of the Tom Green fan club.
I'm not allergic to anything.
I have a lot to learn.
I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
I am shy around the opposite sex.
I'm online 24/7, even as an away message.
I have at least 5 away messages saved.
I have tried alcohol or drugs before.
I have made a move on a friend's significant other or crush in the past.
I own the "South Park" movie.
I have avoided assignments at work/school to be on Xanga or Livejournal.( Apparently I just cannot do that)
When I was a kid I played "the birds and the bees" with a neighbour or chum.
I enjoy some country music.
I would die for my best friends.
I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.
I watch soap operas whenever I can.
I'm obsessive, and often a perfectionist.
I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
I know all the words to Slick Rick's "Children's Story".
Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it. (And I’m proud to say that I love it)
I have dated a close friend's ex.
I like surveys/memes.
I am happy at this moment.
I'm obsessed with guys.
Democrat.
Conservative Republican.
I am punk rockish. (I like the music though)
I am preppy.
I go for older guys/girls, not younger.
I study for tests most of the time.
I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I've ever met.
I can work on a car.
I love my job.
I am comfortable with who I am right now.
I have more than just my ears pierced.
I walk barefoot wherever I can.
I have jumped off a bridge.
I love sea turtles.
I spend ridiculous amounts of money on makeup.
I believe in prophetic dreams.
Plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
I'm proficient on a musical instrument.
I worked at McDonald's restaurant.
I hate office jobs.
I love sci-fi movies.
I think water rules.
I went to college out of state.
I am adopted.
I like sausage.
I am a pyro.
I love the Red Sox.
I have thrown up from crying too much.
I have been intentionally hurt by people that I loved.
I love kisses. (depending on who is it)
I fall for the worst people.
I adore bright colors.
I love Dear Abby.
I can't live without black eyeliner.
I think school is awesome. (Well, sometimes school is fun, most of the time it’s the opposite)
I think pigtails serve a purpose.
I don't know why the hell I just did this stupid thing.
I usually like covers better than originals.
I don't like multi-textured ice cream.
I think John Cusack is adorable. (Seriously?!)
I hate chain theme restaurants like Applebees and TGIFridays.
I watch Food Network way too much.
I love coaching youth sports.
I can pick up things with my toes.
I can't whistle.
I can move my tongue in waves, much like a snakes slither.
I have ridden/owned a horse.
I still have every journal I've ever written in.
I can't stick to a diet.
I talk in my sleep.
I've often thought that I was born in the wrong century.
I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
Climbing trees is a brilliant past-time.
I have jazz in my blood.
I would not be friends if they weren't family.
I wear a toe ring.
I have a tattoo.
I love vaginas.
I can't stand at LEAST one person that I work with.
I am a caffeine junkie.
I know who Santos L. Halper is.
I read trashy romance novels and I am ashamed.
I love wrestling.I am completely tree-huggy spiritual, and I'm not ashamed at all.
If I knew I would get away with it, I would commit at least one murder.
I cosplay or know what cosplaying is.
I have been to over 15 conventions.
I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical, the better.
I enjoy a nice glass of wine with dinner.
I'm an artist.
I have a goal to collect every Johnny Depp movie ever made.
I have an unhealthy Taco Bell obsession.
I have had a crush on a cartoon character when I was a kid.
I have spent more on anime and manga than many spend on computers or other high end products.
I only clean my room when neccesary.
Weight is my enemy! (Although I’m still comfortable with who I am)

One true thing about me: I freak out a lot!

tagged by: Serene
5 people to be tagged : I’ll tag people who don’t have a blog, easier for them and me. Haha! They are my mum, my bro Saiful, my grandpa, my grandma and the old man who lives next door. Hope nobody is offended by this.

I have had my share of screw ups throughout my life but I think this is the ultimate by far in terms of the degree of screw ups I can manage. And yes, it has to do with the Singapore film tutorial I had been posting about a couple of times before. And when I related what happened to my brother, even he said that what I had done was so unlike me and just seems rather weird for me to screw up this bad. What happened? Well, I’ll try to explain in the best possible way in order for people to understand how bad the situation is.

Well, as I had told many, I had decided to have my makeup Chinese tutorial today even though it was at 8am. I attended it with the intention that I would go and appeal for my SF tutorial after that. Chinese tutorial went well and very fun I have to say. But that is not the drama. Basically drama and horror started after the tutorial. So you can say that my happy day ended at 9.30am with the end of the Chinese tutorial.

I went to the Lit Dept as explained in my earlier post to do all the necessary stuff but was told by the lady there that I have to liaise with the lecturer herself. So ok, after hesitating, I did try to meet her around 11. But she wasn’t there but I was fine with it thinking maybe she has a lecture or something. So for the 3 freaking hours, I went to knock at her office about 3 times and there was no answer. And as Tzi says, I could have just asked her after class since I have a lecture with her later in the day. So, that was one kick in the ass for me. But since I was worried, I emailed her just in case about appealing.

And even when I had emailed her, I managed to screw up the email. What happened was that I had written the wrong tutorial slots that I was able to take. And it took me an hour to realise that I was wrong in my email. So, I emailed her again talking about my mistake and gave the correct one.

So during my lecture, she said that whoever needs to do manual registration will see her after class. So I was heaving a sigh a relief thinking well my problem is resolved and things can go well. So at the end of the lecture, I went to her for the registration.

When I told her my predicament of not even having any slot, she gave me the LOOK. The Look that says why did such a thing occur in the first place? You should have known and planned better. But I explained what is going on and she kind of softened a little and managed to “secure” a slot. Notice how a particular word is in bold.

You want to know why? Because that was my second screw up. Yes, indeed, I have done it again. I don’t know how many minutes after I thought I was safe, I realised that I had told her the wrong tutorial slot, a slot which is on the same time as my GSL lecture. It’s like de-ja-vu that turned into a nightmare. So I had to leave Serene and her friend for a while and basically ran from CO-OP to LT12 hoping and praying that she will still be there. Alas, my prayers are not answered and she was not there. I went to her office and not surprisingly she was not there either. So my last resort was to email her another letter telling her about my mistake and I don’t know how many times in that email I was apologising to her.

Now, instead of being happy, I’m now in a state of anxiety and just wondering what the hell happened to me. Making a mistake once is ok, but twice is unforgivable. But making mistakes regarding my education and my grades is madness and just beyond me. I don’t even know how I manage to screw up this bad. I mean I can blame the physical and mental tiredness for making me this blur, selenge and just plain stupid. But in the end, it is still me! I made that stupid mistake and this time it is bad because the period for manual registration is over. It’s a matter of whether she is after all a nice person or just plain strict. No, I’m not going to call her bitch because she did nothing wrong in this case. Even if she did allow me to change to the correct one, I have already created this image of a blur girl who is full of mistakes and just cannot handle things. I mean it affects the respect the teacher has for you also, when you come to think about it. It even affects your own self-respect because now you don’t trust yourself anymore.

I used to pride myself for being efficient and careful although I know that I do not do that all the time. But at least I am above average. For something like this to happen makes me think low of myself at this point and it just breaks you inside. It’s only the beginning of the year and I’ve already screwed up badly. How worse can things get? I know people may say that I’m thinking too much and over-reacting. Yes, I maybe overreacting but this is how I really feel inside. For the past few days, I have been rather down and just out. It’s not because of the extra things that I have taken up this year. I really don’t know what is happening to me. Maybe it’s because I have never really been jolted out of things that I pride myself with; with the exception of my father’s death. I don’t know. But my father’s death and this even make me scared because it reminds me that I am not in control of my life and no matter how much I control, I just cannot. Looking back at what I just wrote, I have to admit this is a long post but it mirrors what I am feeling. It has indeed been a long day full of trauma and just uncertainties and I am really feeling tired. It makes me feel on the verge of just dropping the module. This time, I really am dead serious. I’m not confused or unsure anymore.

This means you have a deep desire to be kind and fair to others. You may even be preoccupied with finding kindness in the world around you, far more than you realize on a conscious level.

It is possible that the underlying reason you seek kindness in the world around you, is that you fear cruelty, the opposite of kindness. That could drive you to unconsciously project kindness wherever possible into your world. Regardless of its origin, your steadfast adherence to being kind to others is felt by people you are close to.

You are probably more susceptible than others to being overwhelmed by emotions — both yours and others'. It is possible that your unusually empathic nature is a result of your natural sensitivity to others' pain, and your desire to help them avoid it. For this reason, things might affect you more than they affect your friends and family. To protect yourself from too much emotional intensity, you might want to keep an eye out so you can recognize it when it starts. That will allow you to slow things down until you feel grounded again.

Overall, your strong orientation towards kindness gives you an optimistic nature, which translates into you seeing the best in the people around you. Because you're not one to be overly judgmental, others may seek out your company when they need a friend to talk to. People close to you likely know that you care deeply about the inner lives of others and can listen to what they have to say without imposing your views on them.

Try the inkblot test now @ Tickle